We had a meeting with our doctors today. Most of the departments we have worked with were there, all except Immunology and ENT. Cardiology was there, they said his heart was stable. It is still large, but they expect it to decrease in size as the stress from his heart is reduced. Neurology was there and they said his hydrocephaly is stable as well. We don't know what the long-term prognosis for mental development is, all we can do is wait.
Dr. Beckerman, the pulomonologist was there as well. He had a little more news for us, good and bad. First he was able to describe the mechanism behind Max's breath holding spells, which no one else has been able to do. It is a rare form of apnea. Where as most apnea spells occur while sleeping, Max's occur while he is awake due to agitation. Also, most apnea spells occur on an inhale, so the breath is held in the lungs. In Max's case, it happens on an exhale. When a person cries, their vocal cords constrict, this is normal and Max does this. Max's vocal cords will constrict when he cries, and as he is crying he exhales, again normal...problem begins because he doesn't stop exhaling. He exhales to the point where there is almost no air left in his lungs. And this is the problem, there is no air left in his lungs for the circulating blood to pull oxygen out of.
They think it is a problem with his Medulla, that it isn't transmitting the signal for him to stop exhaling and take a breath. So finally we have some understanding of what is going on, sort of. The bad news is that they aren't sure if/when he will outgrow this, only time will tell. The neurologist pointed out that the structure of is Medulla is normal, good news, if the structure was malformed they would be able toss ay with certainty that the prognosis for Max is bad, but because it looks normal there is still a chance he can outgrow these spells.
So now we are working to come home. He will come home on anxiety medicine that is working well for him so far. Doug and I will have to go through training on how to take care of him during one of these spells. The reality of the situation is that the spells could potentially kill him. And every time he has a "bad" spell, he potentially causes brain damage. We obviously don't want any of that to happen. So they will train us how to recognize when to take action, and what type of action needs to be taken in each situation.
He will be coming home on Oxygen and monitors. As of right now, our fabulous babysitter, Angie, is willing to keep Max, hopefully after meeting him and seeing one of his spells she will still agree. And even more so, hopefully Max will do well at Angie's. Don't want the stimulation from the other kids to cause him more agitation/spells. If not, Doug and I may have to face living on one income.
I think the hardest part for us will be explaining to friends and family that because we want to limit the agitation and spells, Max isn't a baby that can be handled like normal babies. He won't be able to be passed around at family gatherings. Not everyone will be able to pick him up and cuddle him all the time. Life from here on out, changes drastically, and we have to do what is best for him and our family. Hopefully we will be able to find a good balance and be able to help Max without hurting feelings of those that love him. We will also have to find a way to make sure Makayla and Gunner aren't neglected.
Please don't think I'm complaining. I'm so thankful for my family, husband, and kids. I have faith in God that he is going to heal Max. I look at him and I just feel that it will all be OK. I've felt that way from the beginning, and it hasn't gone away. As Doug said tonight, "how many times have they given us the worst case scenario, and it all works out better than imagined?" And he is right. God is in our corner, and that is the best help we could ask for. We are just anxiously waiting to get our baby home to us so that we can be a complete family, everything else will be fine.
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